There once was a Tesla. A sleek, shiny Model S with doors that opened like wings and an ego bigger than Sydney Harbour. This Tesla wasn’t just any car—it was The Future, according to its slightly eccentric dad, Elon.

Elon, the guy who sends rockets to space like he's mailing birthday cards, had one mission: to make electric cars so cool you'd forget they don’t vroom.

And it worked... for a while.

People lined up like it was a new iPhone. Teslas were everywhere—zooming past petrol stations like they were beneath them. Jason from accounting traded in his Camry. Even Nana Barb got one and named it “Lightning McBarbie.”

But then… things got weird.

One day, Elon renamed Twitter to “X” (because why not?), launched a Cybertruck that looked like a Lego brick gone rogue, and livestreamed himself trying to play Diablo IV while driving. At some point, it was hard to tell if Tesla was making cars or auditioning for a reality TV show called “Elon & The Electric Dream”.

The Tesla stock dipped. Autopilot features went a bit too autopilot. One Model Y decided it was done with driving and gently rolled into a lake (graceful, really). Meanwhile, Elon challenged Mark Zuckerberg to a cage match and accidentally tweeted the entire company’s quarterly earnings.

But through it all—guess what? People still wanted Teslas.

Because no matter how many eyebrow-raising tweets Elon sent, there’s just something about that silent whoosh of electric torque and the smug feeling of never needing petrol again.

Moral of the story?

Buy a Tesla if you must. Drive it, love it, name it “Volty McVoltface” if you want. Just do a REVS check first. Because your car shouldn’t have a mysterious past, even if its maker is living in the future.

And remember—every Tesla has a little Elon in it. Use responsibly.